More Tips for Getting Good Service

You can be assigned "a good waiter" but if he or she senses that you're "a bad diner" then your service may still be somewhat lacking. But even a bad waiter can step up and deliver incredible service from time-to-time, if you just know which of our buttons to push, and which not to push. Part 1 of my Tips for Getting Good Service had more to do with helping you understand a few key things from our side of the table, and you should totally read it before reading this page, which is actually Part 2.

Aside from cues of sophistication (as I explained last time, and the time before that) which can help you get better service when dining in a restaurant, we're just as likely to pick up on cues of unsophistication from you of course, and one of the biggest red flags for us would be obvious indicators of "cheapness" on your part...

Like I said, we're judging you from the very beginning.

Things that convey "tightwad" to us sometimes include ordering "Water with Lemon" or the sharing of entree plates. I'm personally probably a lot more understanding and less judgmental about these decisions than many, many servers are. Just because you choose not to blow a ton of money routinely on frivolous charges does not automatically mean to me that you're going to tip poorly mind you.

However, it does tell me (and other servers) that your total check is going to be less than a table who orders alcohol, $3 soft drinks, big appetizers and full entrees. Ordering frugally, even when tipping 20%, obviously results in a smaller net tip for us overall. Seeing this coming admittedly does prove a little de-motivating for us in general, plus at this point we've no idea of how well you do or don't tip; we just know that our odds of us retiring after you leave have dwindled based on the size of your total check.

I'm certainly not saying never to do these things (you're entirely within your rights to do so and it's my job to bring them to you) but the simple fact is that we earn our living off of other people's excess, and so early signs of frugality can be a little discouraging to us. Unfortunately for you, some servers really will "check out" on you over things like this and perhaps become less attentive, and I'm sorry, and I agree that such is wrong.

However, you can earn a lot of positive points no matter what you're ordering with this ONE little trick : use our names. Most likely, I told you my name, and if you use it, it's a sure sign that you were paying attention to me and actually DO view me as a human being after all. It also suggests that you're experienced enough at dining out to be comfortable and casual in the experience, and more likely a sophisticated diner. I'd recommend using your server's name once early on, then maybe once again. (Three, four, five times gets a little creepy however.) A simple "Thank you Guy" when I deliver your drink or "Hey Guy, we have a question...." goes a long way.

Here's another secret. If we didn't tell you our name, or even if we did, you should ask it, or verify it early on. Why? Acknowledging our humanity aside, many restaurants (corporations especially) use "mystery shoppers" - people who eat for free or perhaps even get paid just for filling out a very detailed report on their experience at the restaurant. The server's personality, proficiency, timeliness and all sort of things are being graded and reported back to the corporation in these instances, and can affect our standing with our bosses very much sometimes. If for some reason we think you're a "shopper" then we're likely to be extra attentive and on the ball. Try it sometime, just don't try it and then tip poorly okay? Servers everywhere will hate me if I give you this information, and then you "fake us out" without tipping 20%, so don't get me in trouble or I will find you.


Possibly the biggest sign of cheapness, unsophistication, and us receiving a poor tip from a guest would be the use of a coupon (or these days, a Groupon)...

The restaurants take a loss when promoting these deals in the hopes of bringing in new customers who otherwise might not ever come in, to try out our restaurant so that we can "wow you" into becoming a regular. A regular who will pay the regular price on future visits, that is. It works to a point and there's nothing wrong with taking advantage of a deal, but we've noticed that these promotions tend to bring in the pickiest, cheapest, stingiest, most demanding people as well, who won't ever be back unless they get another deal, or a gift card...


So sorry it's taken me over two months to crank this little entry out. I've had it drafted for ages but didn't know how to wrap it up. Now I do, so stay tuned for "Coupon People." Meanwhile, maybe you should Google "waiters hate Groupon" just for fun.