So hey How'd that closing shift work out for you?

As you may recall, about 6 months ago I was scheduled my first closing shift at the restaurant. Closing shifts are a large part of "where the money's at" when you're a server, so it's a desirable thing to move into doing regularly. It carries a bit of responsibility, but also pays well because you will (generally speaking) receive more and larger tables (and therefore more tip income) than others on the same shift, as I've detailed previously.

On Guy's Work Blog.

It's also a bit political because of the money involved, and in my case did not go unchallenged, albeit subtly.

I arrive maybe 15 minutes early to look over the restaurant and see what needs to be done before the lunch servers clock out. That's the first thing the closer does.. In order to make sure that the night shift runs smoothly, they need to make sure everything's stocked, prepped and maybe cleaned before others leave, and the closer is left on their own for awhile, before the later-scheduled night servers show up. The closer is in at 4pm where I work, while most other night servers come in at either 5 or 5:30pm - with some variance based on the "season" we're in, and the scheduled reservations for the evening.

I've worked pee-lenty of lunch shifts here by now, and have had many a "closer" come in at 4ish and tell me what all I must do before I'm allowed to leave, so I'm quite familiar with the process. The closer is likely to spend 5 minutes saying things like "We need more lemons cut; There's not enough silver rolled; We're going to need more napkins folded; These ice bins need to be filled up and more to-go cups and straws in these stations...." Just stuff like that. Oh, and our most hated duty.. Butters. More on that one later perhaps.

I've also noticed that most closers try to arrive 10 or 15 minutes earlier than their 4pm schedule says. This is because 1) The lunch people are tired of being there, and will be willing to give up tables seated at 3:55pm if the 4pm closer will ("pleeeeeeeeze") go ahead and take it, so therefore more bank for being early, and 2) Once you start taking tables at 4ish, you're going to be too busy to look around and point out everything that needs to be done, so your co-workers from the daytime are going to "skate out" without doing it all if they can, and then you're going to be stuck under-prepared and with the rest of the PM staff griping at you when they show up because you "let" everyone leave without getting it all done.

So that's what I do beginning around 3:50pm on this day - looking around and seeing what needs to be done, and finding out who I need to politely ask to do it before they leave for the day.

It's not unusual to be met with replies like "I already did xyz and abc - I'm not doing anything else" and "Well So-and-So hasn't done crap all day.  Make them do it..." or perhaps "Really?? You don't think we have enough __________ done already? What kind of Nazi are you?" Then there's the more congenial "Yeh, I know. Been busy. I'll do it before I leave."

That's what *I* usually said anyways, if there was stuff to do that I or another server hadn't already done before the closer arrived. (Same stuff every day, so no surprises here!) But given the above typical responses, you can see the Catch-22 in being like that... the ones who complain the least are generally going to be asked to do the most, because the closer (or manager, depending upon how the restaurant operates) is going to seek that person out just to avoid arguing with the slackers about it.

Those were the things I kind of expected to hear, coming in and looking around.

But no.

What I got this time - and 1 or 2 more times that followed - was

"You're the closer?"

"You're the closer?" and

"You're the closer?"

Upon replying affirmatively, a couple of times the question (stated almost like a challenge) evolved to "Have you ever closed before?" To which I reply "This is my third close, but I switched into the other two. This is my first scheduled one."

"Oh" Pistachio says, trailing off with "Luigi (the manager who makes the schedule) must really like you."

Well, yeh, he kinda does I guess.

Maybe it's because I generally DO what I'm asked to DO without complaining about it.

Now with the preliminaries out of the way, can we get this stuff done people? Geez. I don't want to seem like a jerk who lets a little power go to his head tho, and I start doing portions of the duties I've politely asked these other kind folks to do. Pistachio and Betty (Crocker) are closers sometimes too, just not today. They know the routine tho, and aren't unwilling to do what needs to be done. It's not like I ever gave them much flack for telling me what to do when they've come in at 4pm to close.

It's just that there's maybe the slightest amount of shock they're dealing with. There are only 7 closing shifts per week, and around a dozen servers qualified and sometimes scheduled to do it, off and on. Not everyone gets one per week, and the more "closers" there are, the less closing shifts there are to go around. I know to their minds, the fact that I got this one - and will probably be getting more in the future - means they might be making just a tad less money in the future, based on the newer division of labor they now see unfolding. With that in mind, I'm sympathetic to what they're going through. This ain't my first rodeo, and I've gone through this very scenario a few times already in my career, experiencing it from both sides in fact.

Whether they despise me, or embrace and "Welcome me" to their ranks remains to be seen. I'm just trying to make the choice a little easier for them. If we were busy at 4pm, I might have a table or two to wait on already. But we're not busy, I don't have a table yet, and so I start polishing the silverware they haven't gotten around to yet.

So yeh, that's how the first 15 minutes went...

A little Snarky in the Parky lot...

Not the actual culprit, but if you're the guy on the right,
I'm not afraid to be the guy on the left!

I work at a large complex on International Drive that hosts many, many tourist-oriented shops, restaurants, clubs, etc, and because you can't actually park your car anywhere on (what we call) "I-Drive" this complex has a parking garage attached.

Part of my daily routine involves entering and driving around this parking garage in search of a spot to park my car of course. It's not always easy to find a spot, and proportional to Murphy's Law, the later I am for work the fewer spaces seem available.

I've learned to never go to the higher floors anymore - it's too easy to get lost and forget where I parked. Rather, I've found it's much better to just keep circling the first floor, if no spots are readily available. Someone will leave fairly soon.

So, the one space I actually manage to find recently, is next to an SUV who has parked about a foot over the line, and the family is still disembarking. I think to myself, "I can get in there." Well I'm one of those "back-into the parking space" types that you probably love to hate. I generally find it easier to pull out, than to back out of a spot; that, and Triple A says it's safer too... so nyah. Anyways, I cruise by the family while they walk away, and much to the dad's surprise, I immediately start backing in while he eyes me to make sure I'm not going to hit his car.

I'm kind of good at backing in these days, and while I can indeed squeeze in to the spot without "scraping" either vehicle, I'm leaving only about 3-6 inches between my passenger side, and the SUV's driver side as I slowly, gently proceed to back all the way in. Without caring to, apparently I've gotten the guy's full attention now.

He comes rushing back the 20 feet he and his family have walked and asks me, almost yelling because my window is up "Uhhh, can you get in?"

Stupid question, considering I already am in. I roll down my window and reply "Oh I can get in. I don't know how you're going to get out, but I can get in just fine" and continue on the last foot of my journey.

Then he takes out his keys and kind of pleads, "Here, let me give you some more room..."

As if I needed more room, haha.

I think "Lucky for him, I'm not late for work," pull out again, and give him the time to adjust his vehicle.

Then as we all walked away from the spot almost together it hits me, and I can't help but watch them all rather intently as they walk toward their destination. Sure... "Lucky for him I'm not late for work.." but after clocking in I think to myself

"Lucky for me they're not sitting in my section right now."

Actually, I DID forget about you!

Steve Martin : The Absent-Minded Waiter
http://youtu.be/Fsh47iNVRkM

Since I brought it up, I guess I should confess to you that I actually DID completely forget about a table I was waiting on recently. "Allegedly waiting on" that is.

Yeh, it's pretty snarky when guests at a table say "Did you forget about us?" when you come by. There's a number of reasons they could get that feeling, both rightly and wrongly. Of course there's the possibility that the server in question could just be an awful server, or were perhaps even off smoking somewhere at an inappropriate time, against policy. But occasions like that are probably in the minority.

More than likely, it's just that they were overwhelmed, got stuck at a table that just wouldn't stop talking to them, or were perhaps dealing with some major emergency - like a guest walking out without paying, or someone arguing with their server from intoxication, or a "big top" suddenly announces that they want to pay - like right now - AND they all need separate checks. That's going to take awhile to make happen.

In cases like that, we servers generally have each others' backs. We all run into these situations almost every day, so we're quite inclined to help each other, knowing it's us who's going to need the exact same type of help 5 minutes or 5 days from now. It's quite normal to just grab the nearest co-worker and say "Hey! I got xyz going on. Can you please check on Table 17 for me? Or at least walk by in a minute? I think they'll need water."

or

"Hey! I'm dealing with 8 separate checks and they just now told me. Here's my card/number (to log in to the computer, that is). Could you print a check for 35 / Cash out 110 / pre-bus 409 / show deserts to ..." You get the picture...

In fact, as rude, crude and socially acceptable as it may seem to share here (unsubscribe anytime...) a couple of months ago, I actually received a text from "Wheelie" (not his real name) that read "Taking a dump. Can you check on  41?"

After checking on table 41, I forwarded it to half the staff, adding "Best Work Text Ever!"

But then there are *other times* ...

Heh. Yeh... every now and then we really do forget about you. For me, this will most likely happen when there's just a few waiters on, and we are all being seated "in rotation" rather than "in sections." Hopefully that's self-explanatory, but if not - there's a list at the host/hostess stand with our names on it, and we take new tables in turns, wherever they wind up sitting. This is both fair in the sense that the potential income of a slow shift might be distributed as evenly as possible - and, industry-wide - so that you, the customer, don't wind up getting lousy service from one waiter who has 5 or 6 tables in a popular section (the patio, by the "fish tank," wherever..) when there's three more waiters who may not otherwise lift a finger to help you, because they're all bitter that they're not making money today.

So for example, our place is pretty spread out, kind of like The Prime Cut was when I worked there in Nashville (I would have to RUN sometimes on busy shifts to get from A to B!).

Aside from our "main dining room" there's a lounge area, a banquet room, and an outdoor patio on the far side of the building. The farthest corner of the patio is about 65 steps from the kitchen (I've counted), and then back. "Up-hill, both ways." So if I bring you your food and you need anything else to go with it, I'm 125 or more really fast steps away from getting it back to you. Hopefully, either you will ask for - or I will anticipate - all of your needs the first time, because 2 trips at that pace and distance are going to take about 5 minutes - especially if I stop and check on my other table or tables elsewhere in the restaurant while en route, as I most definitely should.

All that is to say, when I have tables on the patio, one or two in the dining room, and someone in the lounge all at the same time.. well .. occasionally I kinda do lose one in the shuffle. Not for long I mean, but it happens. It's kind of a funny feeling to be walking by a couple dining while on your way to somewhere else, and only when they glance up at you do you remember "Oh yeah! That's MY table! I really should say hi!" Sometimes it's when I'm on the computer, and the screen shows I have more active tables currently open than I currently have on my mind. At that moment I let out a big "D'OH!" and head straight to the table I haven't been paying attention to a lot recently.

Really, no matter the restaurant (over the years) or the lay-out, every server I ever ask the question to about "Have you ever (walked by/logged in) and realized you've forgotten about a table?" says "Oh yes..!" Gosh, I feel almost bad confessing it here, but what can I say...? Completely forgetting about a table we're waiting on occasionally does happen.

But by "forget" I simply mean that we can get distracted, or become otherwise occupied, for a few minutes. This period of "forgetting about" a table would almost never be for more than 4 or 5 minutes in 99% of the cases where it even happens, before we snap and get right back on top of things. I know that when dining out however, that period of needing something and then not seeing your server for two minutes after knowing you need it, can seem like a small eternity however, so I'm sorry to admit we all seem to do it, even semi-frequently.

In those cases, I'd like to offer the advise that you - the paying customer - should just go ahead and ask whoever walks by to get what you need. I've seen that in various points over my career that *some servers* (myself included, years and years ago now) will snap back to your request with "I'm not your waiter" or "You're not my table" perhaps. Or maybe even our favorite passive-aggressive alternative "I'll get your server."

This can happen when a) the place is very busy, b) the person you asked is very busy, or c) your actual server is known throughout the restaurant as being a slacker, and we're all just really sick and tired of waiting on his/her tables while they are off somewhere loafing. I know this happens to you occasionally and I'm sorry. For what it's worth, servers with that attitude will eventually be weeded out of better places - they'll either quit because they can't handle the demands inherent in this type of work, or they'll be dismissed for any number of reasons.

But no matter the case, I'm just saying that you - the paying customer - should always feel free to bring any need to any staff member, without apology. Many guests (relaxed, experienced diners I'd say - not wanting to be imposing maybe) tend to actually handle such situations by simply calmly asking someone "Excuse me, but could you get our server for us?" rather than even express their need. But to my thinking, when I hear that question, I know darn good and well that the only correct answer is "What do you need?" - or perhaps "Is there something I can help you with right now?"

Depending, I may simply go "get their server" or just do it for them myself to save them any further delay. And  I admonish you - the paying customer - if you're used to hearing replies more like the above and less like what I just said, then you need to be looking around for better places - with higher employee standards - to spend your money.

But all that said ... Mannn-nn-nn, I really tanked it like I don't think I EVER have - not in over a decade, at least, if even. We all occasionally forget to put an order in, but THIS ONE... o very bad Guy.

Nice couple .. business travelers actually. Seated in one of those corner tables which we don't really see too easily, or often, except when already in close proximity. I took their order, rang it in promptly for the kitchen, an-n-n-nd .. Well, that's about it.

Just guessing, but about 30 minutes later I happened to walk by their table - on my way to doing something else - when what to my wandering eyes did appear? A couple who hadn't seen me for a year! Dirty plates pushed to the side for removal, and empty drink glasses that said I'd lost all approval.

Feeling awful but acting as nonchalantly as I could muster, I picked up the plates, and sheepishly asked the guy if he would "like another Diet Coke?" Nah ... the woman simply asked "Could we get our check?"

I can't buh-lieve they even tipped me, much less tipped me 20%. Wow, that's grace in action. I did bring them to-go drink re-fills anyway with their check, that they could take with them - I felt awful and it was the very least I could do. *

So it's funny. The ones who most frequently will ask you "Did you forget about us?" are almost always just being smart-alecks, and might be pretty unpleasant to wait on no matter how "on point" you really are. Then the one time it actually does happen that I forget about someone entirely, they're not even mad.

Waiting tables contains so many life lessons sometimes.. I only hope to remember and carry this story in my heart next time I'm feeling annoyed or "dissed" as a customer somewhere, and hopefully have the grace to act like my "Gallant" table, and not like the "Goofusses" of the world.


In all sincerity, in today's world these people could have gone online, mentioned me by name, said how awful I was, and written something that could have pretty much cost me my job. They didn't. Instead, I'm here writing about how awesome they were. God willing, maybe one day they'll read it.


Coming up .. It was slow last night and I made a list of topics, events and subject lines, from all those "drafts" I told you I've been "writing in my head" for the last six months. The list numbers over 30 planned blog entries already (!) so in time there should be some fun reading ahead for you. I just mention this tho to say, that I've received some pretty nice compliments and stuff over my time here of late, and if I'm going to share them, it's a good practice to also share with you my more major guffaws along the way.

So "I'll be right back" with those stories for you.

Unless I forget.

  .

Did you forget about us...?

Hey my peeps!

"Did you forget about us?" is a statement we waiters and waitresses sometimes hear when we've been away awhile. Seemed appropriate enough for this entry. Sorry no bloggie lately. It's been.. months.. I know.

So first of all, my sincere apologies and my sincere thanks to those of you have asked "Guy, what's up with your blog?"

You might still remember from awhile back that I said things has been pretty slow here at our restaurant (the understatement of the year, I would eventually find out) AND that I was looking for another part-time job to fill in the financial gaps...

Well, no part-time restaurant jobs were to be found by me here in Orlando, but I did "take" another "job" and that's where a lot of my time has been going lately. It's one of those "road to financial freedom" thingies that most of us (restaurant servers or not) eventually try out, and long-story-short, I've done okay at it. But as to this work blog, I had to spend many, many nights learning the product and how to present it, and many days off actually doing it. So, no bloggie of late. If you want to see what I've been up to outside of the many restaurant stories that I hope to catch you up on, just see here - www.IncreaseBusinessSales.info - which has an "About Me" section that mentions my restaurant experiences and which you therefore might find kind of amusing.

So, I last spoke of "waiter 1-liners" and promised you more. That train of thought has totally disappeared from my brain for now - sorry! But I do have some drafts and lots more stories in mind from the past several months to relate - God willing in the near future, and as I can make the time. No joke, even tho I haven't blogged lately, I'm still writing these things in my head, even while at work. NO, I haven't forgotten about you!

(Caution however, because in a few entries you may see me flirting with the Dark Side of blogging about restaurant work, as I'm occasionally feeling a tad bitter about certain customers experiences of late. I'm going to let a bit of it seep out maybe, just to give you a more honest reflection of how most waiters feel at times, than you get from my generally up-beat posts...)

About the best I've got now (as far as a one-liner) is something a co-worker "Pistachio" said recently, but behind the customer's back. It's no secret and all waiters know that when someone orders a Diet Coke, you almost might as well bring them two. There's just some yummy addictive goodness in those things I guess. (I wouldn't know because I hate diet sodas. I drink the real thing, and have the waist-line to prove it.)

But on your very first trip back to the table (with bread, or to take the order...) 90% of the time their glass is going to be empty... so I kind of try to practice making a second one *BEFORE* I go back to the table in fact, so I "just have it for them" before they even ask. Scores me big points usually!

Well, no offense to those who drink them (and this is not at all a negative comment about anyone's weight - seriously, I'm at least 30lbs overweight myself) but I saw Pistachio at the kitchen's beverage station saying - as if to his guest - "I think the only one that diet of yours is doing any good is me - 'cos I'm getting plenty of exercise running back and forth to bring you your sixth re-fill!"

Which reminds me, one of the drafts I have for a future blog entry is on "The History of Free Re-fills..."

Stay tuned for more useless trivia than you can shake a straw at.