Gratuity Not Included

(Wow. This is taking longer than I thought it would. I told you the topic of tipping was pretty complex. If this is your first time here, you might want to read Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 of this thrilling series on tipping in restaurants before proceeding.

Definitely read this older link on "How Getting Stiffed Literally Costs Me Money" (as a waiter) or you'll be kind of lost.)


Brazillian Tourists are boosting the Orlando economy,
according to WestOrlandoNews. But mine? Not so much.

 Yes, I know you may not like it when a tip gets automatically included in your bill when dining out, and I know some of you have some genuine horror stories and complaints about this.

But here's one of mine.

Like many in my line of work, instead of spending this past New Year's Eve ringing it in with my lady, I was working late.

Restaurant people get stuck working most major holidays because of the higher volume of people eating out, so this is normal. Those of us in relationships usually do our Valentine's dates on another night, and waitresses who are moms often wind up working doubles on Mothers' Day. Such is our life, and we don't complain about it. Much.

Well, just moments before 11pm (closing time) a family of 7 Brazilian tourists walks into our restaurant for dinner. I've found that Brazillians are something of a mixed bag when it comes to tipping. On the one hand, I think of the nice father/daughter I waited on awhile back who left me a solid 30%. But some I work with say that in Brazil, most people with any money at all have house-servants, and they look at waiters and waitresses as "beneath even them" in life, and can wind up being pretty rude to wait-staff, and not even tip them, or tip maybe only 5 or 10%.

Whatever the case, it's my turn to be seated, so I'm about to find out. My miniscule chance of getting home for the midnight smooch, of course officially flies out the window.

The group lucks into a completely private room because a) that's where I'm stationed tonight, and b) almost everyone ELSE :) dining in the restaurant tonight has GONE HOME ALREADY. So these guys feel like they have the place all to themselves, can really let their hair down and get drunk, loud and silly, which they do.

They all order our modestly-priced $75 per person New Year's "package" which includes appetizers, salads, Certified Angus Beef steaks, drinks, and deserts - but not gratuity - as was clearly stated on the promotional menu. All told, the nice family ran up a bill of approximately $612.97 (which is going to cost me about $30 in tip-out to my support staff, no matter what amount they leave me as a tip).

The clock strikes 12, I pop their champagne (thinking wistfully of being with my own wife right now) pour it for them, and I have a great time (I'm lying) yelling "Happy New Year" with my new friends who don't speak much English. They take pictures - with me in them - over desert, and two of them even hug me on the way out of their own private little party room. Dad puts a fat wad of cash into the little booklet on the table, then offers me a big smile of gratitude for the "muy bueno" time had by all, and shakes my hand as he too, leaves.

I reach for the book. If there'd been just one more person at the table, the auto-grat would have been over a $100 tip. If they go 20%, I'll be looking at $120 - definitely consolation at least for what I'm giving up by being there for them tonight. But I'm no fool, so I'm bracing myself and preparing my heart for ten percent, so as to not be disappointed, just in case.

I start counting. One hundred, two hundred, three, four, five, six .. Six-ten, Six-eleven, Six-twelve, Six hundred and thirteen dollars.

Three cents.

10 or 20 years ago I would have wanted to punch the wall or chase after them into the parking lot. I have done both of these before. Many other unjustly stiffed servers have done just that as well, often yelling, cursing, or flipping their customers off in the parking lot.

Sometimes we pull out the calmer "Excuse me, but was there something wrong with the service?" line while the guests are still in the restaurant, in hopes of politely explaining to reasonable people who have made an honest mistake that gratuity was not included in their bill. But surprise - generally speaking, doing any of the above - or anything ELSE that would just come naturally to anyone who might be reading this and found themselves in the same situation - is grounds for immediate termination in pretty much every place I've ever worked.

While not exactly angry, in this case my more primal insticts begin over-riding my brain, or what years of experience have taught me. I've faced this exact situation perhaps a hundred times (altho never for this large an amount) and I know.. good and well .. that the only smart thing to do...

... is to just let it go.

But no.

This one's just too big a hit to take lying down, and I guess the whole holiday thing makes me feel more emotionally charged about the situation, than is usual for me. "MY picture, is going to wind up on YOUR Facebook "Trip to America" pics, and you're leaving me three cents?!?" O hellz no...

They're still in the building, and I'm going after them.

I leave the private room fully intending to pull out "the calm approach" when I see Luigi, the manager, in the lobby asking them if everything was al-right and wishing them a nice evening. That's not why he's really there, it's just what we restaurants want you to think. He's really there to make sure no other late-night revelers try to slide *in* the door, as these ones are walking out.

His presence is enough to make my brain engage again.

Can't .. say .. jack. Must .. keep .. job. Can't .. do .. squat.

Let it go.

I exhale calmly, hoping that all the bitterness and cancers of the soul this situation can cause for me will be exorcised on the spot. I keep my big mouth shut, and go to finish cleaning up so that I can just leave.

My instincts tell me this was not a malicious act on their part. They're a large group, and at many places in America, gratuity is added automatically on tables of just 5 or 6. At our place it's 8. At some places, they might just get genuinely discriminated against simply for being foreign, and have probably had the tip added to their checks before, regardless of their group's size. Odds are, they honestly thought it was included, but just didn't bother to read the check closely enough to find out.

And as a result, Guy got screwed.

Not that I'm planning on taking a poll, but I am officially voting for tipping being automatic, in certain cases at least.

It's not just for the protection of the servers however. What if Luigi hadn't been standing there, we must ask? What might I have said? What might any server in America - with wayyyyyy less years of doing this than I have under his/her belt - have said? Or done?

Imagine it's you ... What would you have done, knowing that instead of paying you $100 for GREAT service rendered, that these people just cost you $30?

I'm just saying, that the auto-grat is there, in part, perhaps as much for your protection - from the servers that is.


You new here? Read Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 of this thrilling series on tipping in restaurants, and use the box at top to subscribe via e-mail for much, much more.

Buenas Tardes.